Ok my friends, to both guys and girls, lets chat about this. Let me start by saying to each of you…ok imagine hearing my voice (if you don’t know what my voice sounds like, you can go to my IG page) “it is OK to dress nicer than others!!”
Now that I have said that, let’s continue.
If you believe you are not someone that feels comfortable dressing nicer than others, I don’t believe that belief is valid, not for a minute. That is only you getting in your own way. In fact, there is absolutely zero reasons to feel that way. Please do not put up your own barriers or let negative preconceived notions take hold and have power over you.
So let’s go back to the point at hand. When I starting writing this post, I began to wonder and asked myself the following questions about the topic:
1. why do some people feel so uncomfortable anyway?
2. why do some people want to blend in?
3 why do some people want to vanish into the crowd?
4. why make the decision to dress down?
5. why are some people literally afraid to dress nicer than others?
It likely all comes down to self confidence. And I am here to support and help improve your self confidence. You can do this, dressing nicer than others is a step, it is a choice.
I choose to dress nice because I like to. The same can apply to you. You can choose to dress nice because you like to and you feel more confident when you do. You do not have to be concerned with how others will dress. You do not have to dress ‘less nice’ so that others feel more comfortable, that is not your responsibility. You are your own boss. You write your own life. You make your own decisions. You set your own path.
So here’s the thing, you have the choice and freedom to dress nice wherever you go or whatever you do. And of course, there does not have to be a special occasion to do so. Every day is your occasion.
Here is an example from a couple days ago. It was my birthday, so part of treating myself, celebrating being alive and being grateful, I put on a nice dress, gold shiny boots, earrings, makeup, fragrance, nice handbag and went out. I wear what I wear for the entire day no matter what I am doing. I took the day off and went for a walk near the ocean (although for obvious reasons I wore jeweled sandals for the walk and then changed into my boots). Then, I went out for coffee, went to Sephora, went to the drugstore, went to the spa for a facial, went to the garden centre for soil (it was on my way to the spa!) and I did kindly ask the garden centre person to carry out the soil to my car. Anyway, then I stayed in the dress for my take out dinner until I showered and went to bed.
Now while I was out, all dressed up, people did give a look of sorts. It wasn’t a negative look. At least not that I saw. Now, I will say, however, that had I received negative looks, I wouldn’t have given it a second thought and let it affect me because I know that if someone has that type of response, then their response is more about their own insecurities and how they feel about themselves than it has to do with anything about me. Anyway I digress. What I saw is that people looked at me more of the way of ‘why is she all dressed up at 10 am?’ And that literally was all that happened!! The earth did not open up and swallow me whole. There was and is nothing to be afraid of. Nothing should stop you from looking nice and having fun and feeling good about yourself. Why can’t we elevate ourselves and look nice? We shouldn’t feel bad about dressing up nice, or feel uncomfortable, or self-conscious or any other feeling that isn’t a good and positive feeling.
I will say that I do wish that people dressed nicer in Canada. Most Canadians dress very conservative. Canadians also unfortunately dress very casual. Like I have said in my other posts…is that a good thing? I personally do not believe it is. I would prefer we take inspiration from Europeans and dial it up a notch. I would like every one to make the effort toward looking nice, presentable, creative and inspirational.
My concern is that if we do not make a change in the better direction, people in general will start to care less and less and less. And think about it, exactly how far will this go?? Is the farthest we can go is that people will walk around in pajamas all day because ‘why not’ then we don’t have to make the effort to change later, we can just nonchalantly crawl right into bed? I am not saying this to be facetious, I say this because it has already become unofficially acceptable to wear sweat pants or yoga pants everywhere and I am not aware of a clothing item that is in between sweat pants or yoga pants – and pajamas.
Final Thoughts
What I would like for you, is to let go of whatever fear there is or you have and start to dress nicer than others. It may inspire others to do the same. And, I believe deep down people actually like and appreciate seeing someone dressed nice. I know I do! I think to myself ‘well don’t they look nice, good for them!” It should inspire us to think bigger and perhaps get out of comfort zones and habits we may not realize we are in.
As I said in my blog intro, my hope is that my blog helps you see things from another angle, think differently, try something new and improve your self confidence along the way. So with respect to dressing nicer than others, I say, try it ! It’s very liberating. And hey, you may even receive a compliment. I am not saying we should dress nice as a constant need to receive validating compliments from others, validation should come from within. Having said that, it is nice to receive a compliment as it makes us feel good and connected with others. If you try it, let me know the experience and how great you felt.
All the best and until next time…
